Sunday, December 2, 2012

The Sunday funnies

It occurs to me that I should provide the disclaimer I repeated a few times last winter with the Sunday Funnies: I make no claim of accuracy. These are merely amusing stories, quips and anecdotes; some have some truth to them, others are obviously fictional, many come with a variety of punch lines. We're just having fun here.

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The Los Angeles Dodgers under Hall of Fame manager Tommy Lasorda were generally a very good team, but their infield defense for part of his tenure was suspect at best. Second baseman Steve Sax developed a well-publicized mental block about throwing to first base, and the Dodgers, in an attempt to fit another bat in the lineup, were trying to turn slugging outfielder Pedro Guerrero into a third baseman.

Came a day when Guerrero, Sax and their teammates had another rough game afield, and Lasorda had enough. He closed the clubhouse, called a team meeting and lit into his squad, accusing them of insufficient attention in the field.

"You, Guerrero, what in the world are you thinking about out there," the manager demanded.

"I hope they no hit the ball to me," the Dominican replied.

"Don't you think of anything else?" Lasorda asked.

"I hope they no hit the ball to Sax, either."

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